1. Relationship Counselling Can Bring Back Happiness

    October 13, 2013

    Relationship Counselling

    by Jacques Tombazian

    There are times when your relationship can go through a major upheaval. Such situations may arise due to a host of factors ranging from misunderstanding, confusion and indifference to each other’s needs. Whenever there is a discord in the relationship both the individuals tend to suffer. When the suffering increases many couples seek for divorce or separation. Discord in relationship is though common among couples, isn’t restricted to only between husband and wife or lovers. It can be between two friends, a parent and the child or even among business partners. When a fault line develops in a relationship it is worth a try strengthen the bond back to normal. It is famously said sick relationships should be healed rather than abandoned. This is where relationship counselling is of great help.

    Discord in relationship cannot be treated with medication and it needs to be treated with internal healing. It is important for both the parties in a troubled relationship to gain control over their mind and activities and come to terms for a common cause. While healing a relationship one of the first things that the counselor would try and do countering the miscommunication and misinterpretation that lead to problems in the relationship. Individuals often feel suffocated and accuse the other of not accommodating their thoughts and views. Thus when you go for a counseling session they would encourage you to open up and share your side of the story. It might often seem that there is a healthy and sick partner in the relationship. In such cases it is the moral responsibility of the healthy partner to standby the sick partner through the trying times in the relationship.

    One of the things that healing services stress on when it comes to rekindling a relationship is to accept what the other individual has to say about him or herself. You need to accept the fact that their perception might be truer than yours. Often the major reason being discord in any relationship is ego. This tends to make our judgements bias and prevents us from seeing what is obvious. For healthy relationships the counsellor would also need to involve change and transformation in both the individuals and the relationship itself. Since discord arises due to certain activities and traits in the individuals it is important for both the parties to shed some of those activities and traits. The degree of change may differ from case to case.

    Thousands of individuals have benefited from relationship counselling and found happiness again. Alchemy healing practices some of the advanced healing techniques for relationships and leads individuals to an improved physical, mental, emotional and spiritual wellbeing.  Jacques Tombazian is an experienced counsellor who has devised some advanced healing techniques that helps individuals gain back the trust and understanding that often eludes them when there is a discord in the relationship. Alchemy provides energetic support and coaching through hands on healing sessions and distant healing sessions. Many individuals and couples have benefited from this internal healing technique that helps the mind along with the relationship.

    Image Credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/51014621@N00/7448673886


  2. 7 Secrets To A Successful Marriage

    May 20, 2013

    successful marriage

    by Margie Weigler

    Divorce rates are high, and even a lasting marriage is no guarantee that the relationship is a happy or successful one. Yet some couples seem to go on year after year and decade after decade and grow stronger through all of the trials of life. What are the secrets of those couples?

    A Change in Attitude

    Nobody feels in love all the time. People can’t force themselves to feel things, of course, but the ebb and flow of emotions during a long marriage are normal. The essence of commitment is continuing to behave in a loving manner even during times when one feels less than loving. The feelings of love will eventually return.

    Build Intimacy

    Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Gottman have done extensive research on marriages that last, and one of their most important findings is that couples need to build intimacy with one another by responding to what the Gottmans refer to as “intimacy bids.” If couples are not responsive to one another in this way, the marriages tend to fail.

    Be Your Own Person

    While building intimacy is crucial, it’s also important to maintain independence. Couples who have their own friends and interests retain a strong sense of self and stay together because they choose to rather than out of an inability to be alone. These types of couples also continually bring a fresh and interesting perspective back to the marriage.

    Communicate

    The ability to communicate about everything from wants and needs to dreams and even just what happened during the day is crucial to a strong marriage. Different people may have different communication needs; some may not want to go over what happened at work that day while others may feel that several texts or phone calls throughout the day are necessary. The important thing is for partners to make an effort to meet one another’s communication needs.

    Avoid Gottman’s “Four Horseman”

    John Gottman has also identified four tendencies that he considers the death knell for relationships. Contempt, criticism, defensiveness and stonewalling are the four behaviors during conflict that will lead nearly every marriage to failure. Couples need to work hard on avoiding these in order to keep their marriages strong.

    Support One Another

    Among other things, marriage is about mutual support. Whether a partner loses a job, returns to school or faces other challenges in life, a marriage should provide a safe haven for both partners. Support also means being there for one another in the good times. No one should be happier than one’s spouse when a promotion or another important goal is reached.

    Make Quality Time

    It can be easy to fall into a pattern of going to work, taking care of chores and looking after children. Couples must make time to simply be together. They shouldn’t use that time to solve problems or deal with the mundane details of life. It’s not necessary to plan expensive weekends away. Date nights can be arranged even if babysitters are hard to come by. Half an hour talking on the sofa after the children are in bed a few times a week can go a long way toward keeping a marriage strong.

    Image Credit: Katsu Nojiri