1. When you’re depressed: A lesson in self-forgiveness

    June 4, 2013

    stop self-blaming

    by Zita Weber, Ph.D.

    Too often, depression results from excessive self-criticisms.  When you’re feeling guilty, it’s easy to get too down on yourself.  Sometimes the guilt feelings are imaginary and even if they feel real, they can be overly intensified and make you feel worthless.    Getting away from this self-blaming approach is key to starting to feel better about yourself.

    Getting away from a self-blaming approach

    Learn to replace self-blame with a constructive and realistic attitude.  It’s always more empowering to look to the future and what you can do to improve your situation.  Don’t linger in the past.  Sometimes we hear what appear to be simplistic expressions such as:  ‘It’s all water under the bridge’ and ‘What’s done is done’.  Learn to embrace these expressions and take them seriously.  Make your peace with the past but resolve to do things in the present and the future that will make you feel better about yourself.  Learn from past mistakes, but don’t hold onto any blame.

    Learn to practice self-forgiveness

    Practicing self-forgiveness might sound challenging, but the devastating effects of not doing so are highlighted in a novel, Ironweed, which was made into a movie starring Jack Nicholson and Meryl Streep.  The main character, Francis Phelan, accidentally drops his infant son on the floor and the child dies of complications as a result of the injury.  Although this happened many years before the beginning of the novel, the tragic event is revealed through Francis’s nightmarish flashbacks.  Francis is restless, becomes a wanderer and an alcoholic.  While his wife is prepared to forgive him and have him back at home, Francis can’t forgive himself.  In not being able to forgive himself, he dooms himself to a hellish existence.  If only Francis could learn to forgive himself, he could reclaim his life.  The moral of the story is:  don’t be unforgiving of yourself.

    Begin practicing self-forgiveness by accepting that we all make mistakes and we all have times in our lives when we might feel down and depressed because we believe we haven’t met our own standards of behavior.  Learn from these challenges and make sure that you forgive yourself and move on to a more positive place.

    Keep a journal

    Keeping a journal of your thoughts and feelings will help you tremendously when it comes to self-understanding – and self-forgiveness.  Don’t put pressure on yourself by keeping a daily journal if that doesn’t work for you – but make sure that you do write down the important thoughts and feelings that might lead to disorganized, chaotic and self-blaming ideas.

    It’s useful when keeping a journal to dialogue with yourself – ask yourself questions.  It might be difficult asking these questions of yourself, but remember – by asking yourself questions you are clarifying thoughts and feelings and adopting a more problem-solving stance.

    Asking questions – and answering them as honestly as possible – will empower you in your thinking, making matters clearer and imposing a kind of sense and order on them.

    For more skills and strategies in dealing with depression, see Losing the 21st Century Blues (http://zitaweber.com/new-releases/losing-the-21st-century-blues)

    Author Bio: Zita Weber, Ph.D. has worked as a counselor and therapist with individuals, couples and families.  She has researched and written about communication, relationships, sexuality, depression and loss and grief.  More information about her work and books can be found at:  http://zitaweber.com.

    Image Credit: Mark Sebastian


  2. How to use positive affirmations for maximum psychological benefit

    June 1, 2013

    positive affirmations

    We all have the same goal in life when we strip all nonsense to the basics. We all wish to experience as much life as we can, and learn and grow from those experiences.

    Although we could never run of new things to try we seldom do. Most of us have a routine that we stick to for months, or even years.

    We all have baggage we carry

    The reason is that we all have some kind of baggage or a barrier that holds us back from really prospering. These barriers can come in many forms.

    For example, some of us may lack the confidence to go after what we want, others may believe that they are not good enough, and then there are those of us that are addicted to one thing or another, be it cigarettes, alcohol, food or something different entirely.

    Unfortunately it usually takes us a lot more time to deal with our problems than we both planned and hoped it would take. Some of us might never even get close to getting rid of our baggage.

    Positive Thinking

    The first, fundamental thing every one of us needs in order to be able to develop is a positive mindset.

    A positive mindset will make it much more likely that you will find the motivation, strength and endurance to do what needs to be done so you can finally start living the life of your dreams.

    There are many ways to rewire your psyche to think positively.

    Positive Affirmations

    Positive affirmations are just statements which we affirm to be true. We affirm those statements to ourselves.

    The goal of affirming sentences to ourselves is to start believing in them. Positive affirmations a person might recite to him or herself might include ones like “I am confident”, “I always go after what I want”, “I love myself” and “People find me attractive”, among countless others.

    Positive affirmations help solve pretty much any problem you may have, if they are used the right way. Here is list of a few problems they can help you deal with:

    • Confidence issues
    • Health issues
    • Weight loss
    • Quitting smoking
    • The law of attraction

    There are of course many more areas positive affirmations can help you with. You can find a huge list of positive affirmations written to help you deal with almost any problem imaginable at http://www.freeaffirmations.org/.

    How Do Positive Affirmations Work?

    The underlying reason positive affirmations work is repetition.

    Go back to the time when you were in primary school. The way you learnt anything was to repeat it enough times so that you were able to recite it at will, even if someone woke you up at any point during the night.

    That is the same way positive affirmations work. Repeat them enough times, and you will rewire your mind and replace the old, negative beliefs that hold you back with the new, positive ones that will help you take your life to the next level.

    You would use positive affirmations by first writing down the ones you believe would benefit you the most, and then setting up a time each day during which you would recite them to yourself.

    Do stay consistent. Reading them takes only a few minutes of your time per day, while the positive changes that the affirmations would bring would be permanent!

    The Best Way To Use Positive Affirmations

    There are a few things that can help you get the maximum benefit from reciting positive affirmations. Of course, over time you will develop a style that suits you best, but this is a list of things that work form most people.

        1. Stand in an upright position, take a good posture and relax your shoulders;

     

        2. Speak affirmations out loud one by one, with a tone of voice that leaves no doubt that you are confident in what you are saying;

     

        3. Speak in a slow, deliberate fashion. Take your time;

     

        4. Speak in front of a mirror so you are able to catch yourself if you are breaking any of the rules;

     

      5. Smile;

    Reciting affirmations two times per day, once when you get up, and once before you go to bed and repeating your list of affirmations a few times in a row could also help you to maximize their effectiveness.

    As already stated, they work because of repetition. Make a list of affirmations, schedule the time to recite them each day and do so in a confident manner fully believing in what you are saying, and over the next few weeks you should see gradual positive changes in your behavior, and also in the way you feel and the way you think.

    It would be advisable to make a promise to yourself that you will stick to reciting the affirmations for 30 days, and see where to go from there. Basically, when you experience the results after those 30 days have passed, you might realize that positive affirmations might have been the best thing you have discovered in your life.

     

    Image CreditSpencer Williams

     


  3. Five Depression Self Help Strategies

    May 30, 2013

    depression self help

    by Dr. Ralph Bieg

    There are a number of effective depression self help strategies. These strategies can be especially beneficial when used in combination with psychotherapy.

    1) Monitor your self talk (and learn to talk back). No big surprise – depressed people think a lot of negative thoughts. They put themselves down, are critical of others, expect the worse, overgeneralize, and lack hope for a brighter future.  These self-defeating thoughts lead to self-defeating behaviour (Like not even applying for a job that you are qualified for, because you’ve convinced yourself they won’t hire you.)

    When you experience a negative emotion, that negative feeling was preceded and caused by a negative thought.  So if you’re feeling, depressed, anxious, hopeless, guilty, etc. – STOP – and examine your thoughts. You can train yourself to recognize negative thoughts, challenge them, reframe them, put them in perspective, replace them with something neutral (or better yet, positive), or just reject them. Read a good article on how to challenge negative talk by Ben Martin, PSY.D. here. Another useful therapeutic approach is to alleviate negative thoughts using repetition. This approach is described in the article “Handling Negative Thoughts by Repetition” by Tali Shenfield, PSY.D – read it here.

    You can also be affected by other’s negativity. Avoid, or at least limit contact with, the complainers and “Debbie Downers” who see the world as out to get them and their glass as half empty. As much as possible, hang out with happy, optimistic people who see the best in and encourage you.

    2) Keep a gratitude journal, a simple notebook in which you write down at least five things you are grateful for each day, even if it is as inconsequential as your first morning cup of hot coffee. As Christine Kane explained so well in her online article Gratitude Journals and Why They Work, “This is not about living in denial or being phony. What it is about is refining your focus. In other words, I encourage the sensitive and bright people in the world to refocus their sensitivity so that they are sensitive to the joy and the good things in their lives, and not just to how bad and painful things feel to them.”

    3) Take a natural remedy – Consult with a alternative health practitioner or natural health store about natural remedies such as 5-HTP, SAMe, and St. John’s wort:

    • 5-HTP (5-Hydroxytryptophan) is an amino acid that occurs naturally in the body. The body uses the amino acid tryptophan to make 5-HTP, which it then turns into the neurotransmitter serotonin. Unlike serotonin, 5-HTP can cross the blood/brain barrier, accessing the brain from the bloodstream.

    It is also a precursor of the “sleep hormone” melatonin. Serotonin plays a role in mood, appetite, and sleep, and 5-HTP is sold over the counter in many countries as a dietary supplement to treat depression, anxiety, sleep disorders, binge eating and fibromyalgia.

    5-HTP is sourced from the seeds of the West African shrub griffonia simplicifolia. Do NOT take 5-HTP if you are taking a prescription anti-depressant. Both 5-HTP and antidepressants increase the levels of serotonin in the body. Too much serotonin can result in a dangerous condition called serotonin syndrome.

    • SAMe (S-adenosyl methionine) is another naturally occurring substance found throughout the body, and in high concentrations in the brain. It too can cross the blood/brain barrier, and affects the metabolism of neurotransmitters, including serotonin and dopamine. It also influences hormones.

    While clinical studies have shown that SAMe is effective in alleviating depression, scientists aren’t sure why. It’s speculated that it facilitates synthesis of the same neurotransmitters that anti-depressants act on. It has long been used as a prescription depression medication in Europe.

    According to an editorial by Dr. J. Craig Nelson in the American Journal of Psychiatry, “Low levels of SAMe have been reported in the cerebrospinal fluid (CSF) of severely depressed patients. Oral and parenteral administration of SAMe result in a rise in CSF SAMe concentrations, indicating the compound crosses the blood-brain barrier. An increase in SAMe levels has been positively correlated with improvement in depression. SAMe concentrations also appear to rise in patients who respond to other antidepressants such as desipramine. SAMe is produced in the one-carbon cycle involving folate, homocysteine, and vitamin B12, and abnormalities of each of these compounds has been associated with depression. ”

    “In short, the hypothesis is that abnormalities in the one-carbon cycle may result in low concentrations of SAMe that in turn may limit the synthesis of brain neurotransmitters such as serotonin, norepinephrine, and dopamine. This may directly contribute to depressive symptoms or interfere with or limit the action of other antidepressants. Administration of SAMe may ameliorate these deficiencies or augment antidepressants and facilitate neurotransmission.”

    Whatever the mechanism, SAMe works to alleviate depression faster than prescription drugs and other alternative therapies, sometimes within a week.

    • St. John’s Wort (hypericum perforatum) was one of the earliest popular natural remedies for depression, and is the most studied. It has consistently been shown to work as well as, or better than, prescription antidepressants for mild to moderate depression. The plant may prevent nerve cells in the brain from reabsorbing some chemical messengers involved in mood, including dopamine and serotonin. St John’s Wort is a stimulant, and may not be the best choice of natural antidepressant for those who experience anxiety.

    Taking St. John’s wort can weaken many prescription medicines, including antidepressants, birth control pills, and some HIV, cancer and heart medications, so make sure your health care provider is aware of every natural remedy and prescription medication that you are taking.

     

    4) Light therapy – If your depression typically occurs in the late fall and winter, it may be seasonal effective disorder (SAD), linked to a lack of sunshine. SAD may respond to a light therapy box, also known as a light box, bright light therapy box or a phototherapy box. Light therapy boxes mimic outdoor light.

    According to the Mayo Clinic, researchers believe this type of light causes a chemical change in the brain that lifts your mood, and eases other symptoms of SAD. Most people use light boxes for at least 30 minutes every morning.

    5) Emotional freedom techniques, or EFT, is described by founder Gary Craig as “an emotional version of acupuncture, except we don’t use needles. Instead, we use a simple two-pronged process wherein we (1) mentally ‘tune in’ to specific issues while (2) stimulating certain meridian points on the body by tapping on them with our fingertips. Properly done, EFT appears to balance disturbances in the meridian system and thus often reduces the conventional therapy procedures from months or years down to minutes or hours.”

    While the fastest results are likely achieved with a trained therapist, EFT can be learned and practiced on one’s own. Craig has released his work into the public domain, and free tutorials can be downloaded from his website, www.emofree.com.

    While serious and long lasting depression should always be reported to and evaluated by your doctor or a mental health professional, mild or moderate depression will likely respond to a combination of these depression self-help techniques. They can also be used along with therapy and/or prescription medication (but don’t take the natural remedies along with anti-depressants) for more serious and deep-seated depression.

    Consistent use of self help methods like positive self talk, a gratitude journal and Emotional Freedom Techniques will result in lasting change in how you think about and experience life, lessening your chances of experiencing future depression.

    Finally, But first, don’t ignore these obvious and often repeated basic self-help advice for depression, including:

    • Getting enough sleep.
    • Eating a healthy diet (lots of fruit, vegetables and whole grains).
    • Meditating, or practicing relaxation.
    • Avoiding “self medicating” with alcohol, recreational drugs, and/or food.
    • Exercising – even if it’s just a couple of 10-minute walks a day.

    With this foundation, you will have much more success in your fight with depression.

    Image Credit: Daniel Horacio Agostini 


  4. Lets Be Happy – Positive Psychology in Action

    May 23, 2013

    I am back from a week of R&R in Kripalu Yoga Center and feeling very POSITIVE. Seriously positive! It is not only the yoga, meditation, scenery, nature hikes, and being surrounded with nice people, etc. It is also seeing people actively pursuing their goal of living HAPPY lives. As Tal Ben-Shahar, a positive psychology guru, once said “There’s more people wanting to be happy than rich”. Well, we all know “money cannot buy happiness”, so why not go straight to the goal and be happy? Simple eh? Well it is indeed.

    Tal happened to be in Kripalu this week teaching the course on Positive Psychology for social workers and therapists. I didn’t attend the course but spoke to some participants and they were totally overwhelmed. Apparently, being happy is SIMPLE! You just have to focus on the right things. Here I’d like to offer this short video by Tal Ben-Shahar talking about the “Incredible Power of Positivity”. Just watch and learn:

     

     

    So let’s start asking these questions: “what’s going well in your life?”, “what’s going well in your relationships?”, “what are your strengths?”. Let’s talk about our happy moments and happy experience and focus on positives. May be this will shift your balance and attitude?

    According to Dalai Lama, “Compassion is a state of mind where you extend how you relate to yourself toward others as well” If you dislike or even hate yourself you’ll create this “hate wave” towards others as well. Dalai Lama teaches us that the key is to start loving ourselves first: “Yourself first, and then in a more advanced way the aspiration will embrace others. In a way, high levels of compassion are nothing but an advanced state of that self-interest. That’s why it is hard for people who have a strong sense of self-hatred to have genuine compassion toward others. There is no anchor, no basis to start from.”

     

     


  5. 5 Psychological Tricks to Help You Lose Weight

    May 17, 2013

    Positive psychology to lose weight

    by Matthew Denos

    You’ve tried flexing almost every muscle you have in the battle of the bulge, but you may have overlooked the most important one.  In fact, you are using it right now to read and understand – it’s your brain! The mind is a powerful thing and positive psychology teaches you how to program your brain to get results you want. You can have amazing results and bring about the weight loss and a better health you so desperately want to achieve.

    Interested?  Here are five of the best psychological tricks to “manipulate” your mind to get the healthy body you want.

    1. Give Yourself a Written Guarantee

    In a published psychology study, scientists wanted to test the theory that writing about something important—not related to health, interestingly—might actually boost weight loss.  They had a group of college women come in, have their weight and Body Mass Index (BMI, a index that shows if you are obese or of normal weight) documented, and then write a list of things important to them in their lives.  Things like religion, friends, and relationships all topped most lists, with less significant things at the lower end.

    The group was split in half, and the first half was asked to write a free form essay for 15 minutes (in other words, just sit down and write, no structure required, no grading) about one of the top items on their lists and explain why it is important for them.  The other group was asked to write about something far down the list, and not how it related to their own lives, but how it might be important to someone else.

    Over half of the women were already overweight or obese, and the others were at a BMI very close to overweight.  All of them were unhappy with their weight.

    After the 15 minute writing exercise, the women left, and came back to be measured again 2-3 months later.

    The group who had written about strong values important to their own lives had lost an average of almost 4 pounds, while the group who had written about lesser values and not even relating them to their own lives had gained an average of almost 3 pounds! And the group who lost weight also had smaller waists, regardless of BMI.  None of these women had been told that the writing exercise had anything to do with losing weight.

    Researchers conclude that writing about things important in our lives can trigger calm, centering us back to what is really important, and giving us a way to deal with stress and daily setbacks in life without reaching for food as a coping mechanism.  It can make us feel better about who we are, and free up mental resources to focus on goals and willpower.  Pretty amazing.  Go get your pen and start writing!

    2. Give Your Body A Good Review

    The more acceptive you are of who you are right now, the more likely you are to be able to lose weight.  People who have a negative self image of their bodies are much more likely to have trouble losing weight and keeping it off than their counterparts who don’t worry about their size, shape, or what others think of them.

    A study I read in the International Journal of Behavioral Nutrition and Physical Activity noted that women in the study who were taught techniques to handle diet setbacks, and to have a better body image all lost more weight than a second group who didn’t get that same training.

    In some ways it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy—when you think you aren’t good enough, you act on those feelings, and undermine your own efforts with losing weight and being healthier.  So give yourself a break, and focus on all the great things about you.  When you are happier with yourself, you will treat yourself better, and know that you deserve to lose weight and feel good.

    3. Eat With The Right Size of Fork

     

    Another little mind game to win at weight loss is to use the big fork to eat at restaurants and the small fork to eat at home.  This one is a clear example of how your mind controls so much that you do, and you aren’t even aware of it!

    Researchers from the University of Utah did some field experiments and found that, for a variety of reasons, diners in restaurant settings didn’t use the same cues to realize they were getting full as when they were at home.  When we eat at home we rely on our hormonal signals (feelings of satiety) in order to stop eating. Since it takes several minutes for our brain to send these signals after food reaches our stomach, by the time satiety kicks in those who eat fast using big forks end up taking in more food than those who eat slow using small forks.

    In contrast, when we dine out researchers say that we pay attention to a visual and more immediate satiety signal: The size of the dent in the food on our plate. This is because when we go to a restaurant, we invest more time and money toward satisfying our hunger than when we eat at home. We are therefore more eager and impatient to see we are progressing toward our goal of satisfying our hunger.  Using a big fork means we make a big dent in our food and therefore we get an immediate and perhaps unconscious feedback that we are progressing well toward our goal. We soon stop eating. Using a small fork, on the other hand, means we make small dents in our food, and we receive a weaker cue of goal progress. You therefore keep eating for a longer time and end up eating more food.

    That’s it.  Use the small fork at home and take small bites to help you eat less, but when you are dining out, bigger is better (in your cutlery at least!)

    4. A Picture Is Worth 1000 Words… and Too Many Calories!

     

    One study actually proved what most of us have always known—you see a picture of a delicious something, and you want to eat that delicious something, right now.  I know I’ve been watching TV and a food ad comes on—and suddenly I am hungry, no matter how much or when I just ate.

    Researchers took a group of young males and studied how their bodies reacted to looking at pictures, of food and non-food items.  The ones with food had an immediate release of the food hormone ghrelin, which can give you that “I want to eat right now” feeling.

    If you are on a diet, be aware of how sneaky advertising and cooking shows can be in tricking your mind into wanting to eat when you see pictures of food.

    5. Sleeping Enough Can Mean Eating Less

    Your body and mind need adequate cycles of sleep to function in top order.  Think of a car—if you never tune it up, put in the worst fuel, don’t wash it, and let the tires get bald and low on air, that car will never perform right and eventually you will ruin the worth.  You are like that too; your body needs to be treated well to perform well.

    When you don’t get adequate sleep—7-8 hours or more really is best—your mind is much more likely to let you overeat. And since lack of sleep is becoming pretty common, it might explain part of why today 2 out of 3 people in the US are overweight or obese.

    Uppsala University researchers did a study involving a group of young men who were deprived of a night’s sleep and then tested in a variety of ways.  Brain activity and hormones showed high levels of wanting to eat. Moreover, the participants metabolism was lower the morning after not sleeping. A low metabolism, eating more, moving less, and feeling more stressful are all things that tend to go hand in hand with weight gain, or trouble losing weight.

    So listen to your mother, and get a good night’s sleep!

    Your mind can be your best friend while dieting. If you take for granted all the things your mind can do, you might find yourself struggling with weight gain and the inability to lose it for reasons you can’t explain. Fill it with positive thoughts and the right images, and you are programming the power of your brain to help you lose weight and be healthy.  No wonder you always hear, “think thin!”

    Image Credit: Hilde Skjolberg


  6. The Bright Side of Life

    April 28, 2013

    positive thinking

    by Jamie Arnold

    Whenever events and circumstances make us unhappy, we usually ask ourselves questions like

    –          What is the reality of the situation?

    –          What should my attitude to it be?

    –          What should I do about it?

    There is not much in the way of wise counsel, be it religious, philosophical or psychological, that does not in some way address these basic questions.

    The Monty Python film “Life of Brian” pokes fun at the whole matter by ending with a crucifixion scene in which the song “Always Look at the Bright Side of Life” is sung. Originally written for the film, this song is now a virtual folk anthem, glaring irony and all. It’s an ode to the extremes to which we humans will go to view life with a tall order of stiff upper lip topped off with Polyanna’s rose-colored glasses.

    Shadow and Light

    What’s the alternative to forced, seemingly unfounded, optimism in the face of unhappy emotions and experiences? Psychotherapy and psychiatry are readily available to help us with what ails us mentally and emotionally so that we can gain perspective, heal if necessary, and go on with life. Engaging in psychotherapy does not require a simplistic optimism that belies the darker realities of a situation; it encourages us to explore these shadows in more depth.  On the other hand, some branches of psychology have emerged in reaction to what they see as a singular emphasis on negative human conditions in their field. Humanistic psychology and positive psychology focus a little more on the bright side, so to speak. Rather than dismissing Polyanna, a psychologist studying positive psychology would be interested in her core attitudes and coping mechanisms to see if they have the potential to make the rest of us healthier and happier.

    Positive thinking is one of the central ideas of the so-called New Age movement in America and elsewhere. It also permeates Buddhist thought and, probably, the commonsense attitudes of many of our ancestors who somehow survived to pass on life to those who thrive today. Despite the need to understand and address what seems like negative realities, our mental health really does appear to benefit if we get into the habit of putting a positive spin on our lot and especially on the future.

    Give Yourself the Gift of Positive Thinking

    Neuroscience has entered an exciting era in which brain imaging is being used to identify what the brain looks when we feel joy, hope and other positive emotions. By scanning to identify which areas of the brain are more active when we feel upbeat and optimistic, neuroscientists can even devise ways to train and exercise those areas of the brain to become activated more readily. They can also identify areas most associated with depression and other psychiatric imbalances and likewise create more accurate ways to lessen the effect of those types of brain activity.

    This is exciting news for everyone alive today. Our generation is blessed with the knowledge and the proof that it’s possible to change our thoughts and attitudes for the better, and that, most of all, it’s beneficial for us in the long run to do so. The catchphrase for this phenomenon is brain plasticity, which refers to the fact that we can train and improve our brains just as we can our bodies. All it takes is the right set of methods and exercises.

    A Healthier, Happier You

    What are some of the benefits of cultivating positivity and optimism? According to experts at the world-renowned Mayo clinic, you’re more likely to live longer with a higher quality of life, experience less depression, enjoy a stronger immune system, experience less heart disease and better manage stressful situations. Whether optimism is a cause or effect of living a healthier lifestyle, there is a relationship. Positive people tend to be more physically active and eat healthier foods while engaging in fewer addictive behaviors.

    If you don’t feel that you have the positive mental attitude that would bring you these benefits, try some simple exercises and do them regularly just as you might start a physical exercise routine. Maintain your motivation by detaching from any expectations for a while. If you expect to feel better overnight and it doesn’t happen, don’t let yourself become discouraged; just keep going. Develop positive affirmations that you can apply to your life, or borrow some generic sayings from religious or self-help sources and repeat them until their simplicity begins to win you over. There is a piece of traditional folk wisdom that suggests, “If you’re not happy, fake it and it will eventually feel real.” This is absolutely true. The brain begins to remold itself to reflect a more positive outlook. Enduring happiness may not be as simple as that, but research suggests this approach is on the right path!

    Your positive inner coach should focus on simple phrases that deal with a better future, forgiveness, gratitude and other humble concerns. The capacity to believe that even bad situations and feelings will turn out for the best is a powerful antidote to life’s ills. Holding on to anger and disappointment have the capacity to poison us, so stop counting your wounds and affirm your forgiveness of others. Likewise, make simple statements of gratitude for the people, experiences, and opportunities that benefit your life.

    Are you ignoring negative realities by practicing positive thinking? Perhaps you are; or you may be avoiding putting a negative spin on a more benign reality. Each situation and each person is different, but adopting a positive attitude can absolutely help you feel happier in the long run. Just give it a try – it’ll work wonders in your life.

     Image Credit: Wagner Cesar Munhoz


  7. Celebrating Stress Awareness Month by Mastering the Art of Positive Thinking

    April 24, 2013

    Positive thinking

    Image Credit: Wagner Cesar Munhoz

    by Melissa Page

    April 1 marks the beginning of the National Stress Awareness Month, which was designated since April 1992. What better time to engage in stress-relieving steps for a happier and healthier life than today?

    Articles on managing, if not relieving, stress has gained a great deal of attention in the recent years. From what we’ve heard and read, positive thinking (aside from relaxation and coping techniques) has proven to be helpful in decreasing a person’s stress levels.

    What is positive thinking?

    Positive thinking is an attitude that makes you face life’s challenges with a positive outlook. It doesn’t necessarily mean ignoring the bad ones; instead, its about approaching stressful events in a more positive light.

    You may have heard the question Is the glass half empty, or half full? a hundred times. It may sound ordinary, but your answer to that question actually illustrates your general outlook in life.

    If you answer the second option, you’re on the right track. Why?

    Benefits of thinking positively

    According to the Mayo Clinic, positive thinking is more than just a stress buster – it eventually leads to a drastic improvement of one’s health. Researchers have found that a person who thinks positively is most likely to have an increased lifespan, decreased depression rate, greater resistance to the common cold, better psychological well-being, reduction of death through cardiovascular disease, and better coping skills.

    Ways to promote positive thinking

    1. Avoid negative self talk.

    Does your inner voice focus on negative thoughts? Do you mentally tell yourself you’re no good? Try to take a moment to stop and assess what you tell yourself.

    If your thoughts center on negative ideas, turn that negative self-talk to positive self-talk instead. Replace your negative statements with milder wording. For instance, instead of saying “hate,” say “don’t like.” Sounds less negative, right?

    2. Develop a list of affirmations.

    Do you think your life is a mess and you are a failure? To overcome this negative feeling, developing a list of affirmations may help. Positive affirmations help you reprogram your thinking and gives you positive attitudes and thoughts to promote self confidence.

    Affirmations such as “I finish my job with ease” or “I see challenges as an opportunity to grow” are good examples. List them down and read them to yourself at least twice a day!

    3. Surround yourself with positive people.

    As the adage goes, “Tell me who your friends are and I’ll tell you who you are.” More often than not, the people we mingle and stay close to have influence on us. How your friends react will eventually be the way you react as well.

    It helps to be with people who think positively. When you are together, you get to learn and follow their type of thinking in response to different situations. If you stay with negative-minded people, your habit of negative self-talk will be difficult to change.

    4. Smile and laugh often.

    A real, genuine smile can help change how you see things in life. Although it can be really difficult, it is important to stay open to laughter, humor, and lightness. Sometimes, when you see potential humor in a situation, you tend to reduce stress and lighten your mood.

    So next time you’re under a cloud, try watching something funny online or read a joke you always crack up to. Smiling and laughing helps you psychologically and physically, too!

    5. Cultivate optimism.

    Even if you are an optimist since birth, positive thinking needs effort. Staying optimistic is like strengthening a muscle –  the more you use it, the stronger it will become. When you start to engage in negative thinking, don’t hesitate to ask help and encouragement from friends and family.

    Are you now ready to enjoy greater happiness, health benefits and well being? Start thinking positive!


  8. Positive Thinking? Three Steps To Adopting “Positive Mindset”

    March 28, 2013

    positive thinking

    Image Credit: Junn Kang Too

    Recently, Positive Thinking has become a fashionable and much debated topic in our society. Like any new concept, the positive mindset remains a largely misunderstood idea and sometimes it is being practiced in the wrong way. For example, many people think that having a positive mindset means everything will be okay if they ignore their problems or pretend they do not exist.

    Such thinking is frivolous. Some introspection is required to truly understand and have a positive mindset; one must explore the concept in more depth. I’ve challenged myself to do so, and have come up with the three most important aspects of a positive mindset. These three points are fundamental to applying the concept in a realistic, practical way. We can go further and say, if you absorb these three points and apply them every day, you will benefit from significant improvements in your life.

    So, please read on and consider deeply these three points:

    1. Positive thinking is about taking responsibility for your own life

    A fundamental step to adopting the right kind of positive mindset is the decision to take responsibility for your own life. You must accept that everything that is happening in your life is because of your past actions or inaction. You must stop blaming other people and external circumstances. You, and only you, are responsible for any failures in your life.
    Only you can change your own attitudes and feelings, and then can you handle other people and outside circumstances in a reasonable manner. For example, let’s say it’s raining outside, and that has put you in a bad temper. Your bad mood makes you unproductive at work and argumentative at home.  And all for what? You can’t stop the rain, but you can change your mood. That would be a positive mindset. Do you see what I’m getting at?
    You, and only you, are responsible for your life. Therefore, if you want to achieve something, you must make it happen yourself, nobody else will do it for you. Once you take responsibility for yourself, then you can change your life and start to achieve your goals. However, if you think everything is the responsibility of other people, then you are powerless, and you will never achieve anything.

    Take some paper and write down all the things that you love in your life.

    Now take responsibility for them.

    Well done. You have achieved Point One. You can be proud that you have accepted this responsibility. You are not expecting others to do it. It is YOU, who has gathered together your courage and taken that first decisive step. The good news is that now you have done this, you have control of the situation, and you can start improving it.

    2. Decide what you want

    You have now taken charge of your life and you accept that you are responsible for all your successes and failures. Good. The next step is to decide exactly what you want to do with your life. Positive thinking is mostly about really wanting to achieve your goals and desires, despite everything and everyone around you. If you come up against a difficulty or a problem, don’t just stop and stare at it. You must find a way to overcome it. You can only do that if you know what you want and why you want it. That is why we have Point Two; it is important to decide what you want.
    Stop thinking about what you don’t like and think about what you do like. Concentrate and look deep inside yourself. What are your biggest and deepest desires? Write them down. Say them out loud. Imagine them. Feel them. Visualize them! You see, you do know what you want, and I am sure that immediately you are feeling better for knowing this.
    Sadly, most people surrounding you probably do not know what they want, while they are very good at knowing what you should not want. However, your plans and objectives are none of their business. We are talking about your security, not theirs. These people are obstacles in your path to be ignored, overcome or simply gone around. Stay focused on your goals, and you will surmount all obstacles!

    3. Imagine that you already have it

    At the beginning you might have been sceptical about visualizing your desires. Now is the time to change your mind. Imagine that you already have what you want. Visualize it. The subconscious mind is very powerful! Your subconscious will start thinking about how to achieve that goal, without you realising it.

    In fact, your subconscious mind has always worked for you; you have just never realised it until now. Positive thinking is simply a method for getting in touch with, and using your subconscious mind.
    The more often you imagine that you have achieved your goals, the closer you will come to actually achieving them. Visualization is a tool that successful people use all the time to achieve their goals. If you want to join them, start doing it now!
    If you have read and understood everything written here, then you will have stopped blaming others for a less than perfect situation. By “others” we mean your boss, colleagues, secretary, the opposite sex, government, and the whole world. Now you understand that positive thinking is not an escape from problems. Nor does it mean you can ignore those problems. Instead, it means acceptance and goal-seeking. However, a word of warning – always be realistic in assessing your situation, because positive thinking does not guarantee that everything will be rosy.


  9. Does Positive Attitude Assist Healing Process?

    March 1, 2013

    Positive attitude

    Image credit: The Doctr @ Flickr.com

    It’s a debate that has gone on for years, and continues to be discussed by physicians and psychologists. The issue of whether positive thinking affects the medical treatment of patients is one that is hard to resolve. Many patients have seen positive, traceable results when they focused on staying optimistic, but psychologist Richard Sloan, a professor of behavioral psychology at Columbia University Medical Center, says that for every patient who has seen results from positive thinking there may be others who thought the same thing and are no longer alive. That said, public figures such as Lance Armstrong, Gabrielle Giffords, and others attribute a large part of their recoveries from serious illnesses and injuries to their strong spirits.

    Although it’s hard to prove, there have been many cases where a positive outlook showed traceable medical improvement in a patient. This confirms the theory of the placebo effect. The placebo effect is defined as “the measurable, observable, or felt improvement in health not attributable to an actual treatment.” In other words, it is when patients are given sugar pills in place of regular medication, or are told that a medical procedure was done, when in reality it was not done, and a measurable improvement occurs. There have been numerous cases where the placebo effect showed marked improvement in patients’ medical conditions, even though no real medical intervention was being administered.

    In 2007 researchers from the University of British Columbia tested the placebo effect on patients with Parkinson’s disease. They gave one group of patients apomorphine, a drug which mimics dopamine, a chemical in the brain that is deficient in patients with Parkinson’s. They gave the second group a placebo, and they, too, released dopamine, in response to the expectation of receiving medication. This study clearly proved the validity of the placebo effect, and as such, that the mind has a large role in medical treatment of the body.

    While physicians and psychologists will continue to debate the issue, there can be no harm in focusing on a good outcome, and it may actually lead to improved results. Dr. Deepak Chopra is a big believer in the power of the mind when it comes to healing. He explains that one who is at peace with himself can reap the benefits of positive thinking, which can include a decline in high blood pressure, weight, stress levels, and other negative symptoms. In Dr. Chopra’s words in an article for the Huffington Post, “The everyday choices we make affect not only our physical health, but all dimensions of our collective health and well being. This is not to say that pharmaceutical and surgical interventions are not warranted… But looking at them to solve all of our illnesses has made us as a society overlook the powerful self-healing mechanisms within us.”

    The objective of practicing positive thinking is to make use of the healing systems that lie within our bodies to help assist in recovery from various illnesses.

    External factors can help patients maintain a positive attitude. Studies have shown that even the scrubs worn by nurses can help improve patients’ state of mind, which can then help them recover. In a study done on hospitalized children in Florence, a large percentage of the children were more confident in their nurses, and were uplifted when their nurses wore printed or colored Carhartt scrubs. While the donning of Carhartt uniforms is only a small factor in the grand scheme of treatment, everything that contributes to a positive state of mind can help facilitate patient recovery.

    A crucial aspect in keeping patients upbeat is adequate family support. Family and friends who visit often and show the patient that they care can have a marked improvement on treatment, as they will cause an uplift in spirits, which can only lead to good things. Doctors, also, will usually make the effort to visit patients and address their fears before a procedure so that the patient will be calm, and the procedure will go smoothly. A good bedside manner is very important in a doctor, and some patients will choose one doctor over another based on this, because the doctor’s bedside manner will also affect the patient’s attitude.

    The Mayo Clinic strongly recommends that patients should practice positive thinking techniques throughout the day, in order to train themselves to think optimistically. They provide tutorials and exercises for patients to become positive thinkers, in order to facilitate the medical treatment being administered.

    Patients have an array of options to choose from when looking to practice various exercises and techniques that will help them remain upbeat. These may include meditation, hypnosis, spirituality, progressive muscle relaxation, and other methods. The factor that all of these practices share is a focus on a calm, peaceful state of mind, which can go a long way toward helping patients’ medical conditions.

    Whether or not a positive state of mind has a serious affect on patient outcome will continue to be debated, but all the experts agree that when it comes to medicine, only good things can come from positive thinking.

    Bio:

    Josh Weiss is a freelance writer and a believer in the power of positive thinking.


  10. Positive Actions for Your Physical and Mental Health

    February 24, 2013

    Enjoy Longer Life

    There are all kinds of hacks out there, hacks to work well in the office, hacks to keep that computer running on maximum capacity, but what about hacks for the body and mind? The answers are out there to promote a longer, fuller life and your emotional and psychological well-being. You don’t need to be a physician or psychologist to understand these.  Most of these answers are common sense and it won’t take a lot of work, but positive lifestyle changes are key.

    Cut out inflammation!

    Inflammation is at the root of numerous health hazards that cause the human body to break down. Heart disease, extreme weight gain, and cancer result from a state of chronic inflammation. Unhealthy life styles that include too much insulin and too much stress mean bad news when it comes to longevity. Add a lack of relaxation, sleep, and activity for a nasty combination. People who lose the battle tend to forget to have fun. The motto should be, “Play hard, eat right, and rest up for another day.”

    Change is good!

    What can we do? Make a positive change for the better. Start eating right and getting exercise. The formula for a longer, healthier life hasn’t changed. Stop worrying, any psychologist will tell you that mental health is a foundation for your physical well-being  Get moving. It doesn’t have to be intense exercise, but physical activity should be a part of our daily regimen. A morning or evening walk is a simple fix. Not only does it promote physical health, it is positive for your emotional health results as well. People have to stress less and enjoy life more. You don’t need to go to psychologist for this, just learn to be in piece with reality. Cut out the smoking, get rid of the processed foods, and sleep well. Indulge in treats now and then, such as a glass of red wine or a piece of decadent, dark chocolate. The rest of the time, eat lean meats, fresh produce, and forget about the junk. Old habits may die hard, but a longer life is worth the effort. Learn the body hacks and live well!

    This health information was brought to you by BestHealthDegrees.com